Have you ever been physically close to someone, even in bed, and felt a huge distance between you?

Have you ever been thousands of miles from someone yet felt as if they were right next to you? If so, then you already know loneliness has little to do with being alone.

Loneliness is more a function of how you perceive yourself relative to your environment. This myth of loneliness getting solved by someone else's presence goes back to one we covered earlier, the idea that someone else can "complete" you.

Both of these myths come from a common phenomenon all of us have in varying degrees: not recognizing all parts of ourselves. For some reason, everyone thinks other people possess qualities they themselves don't-the grass is always greener (or browner), so to speak.

In a dependent relationship, you assume the other person has something you don't. Yet you do have the traits they possess, possibly in a different form because you have a different hierarchy of values. Honor your own form! The next time you meet someone who seems to have something you don't, you'd be wise to look deeper and see where you actually do have it. Keep asking yourself where you have it until you can see that you own this trait in equal measure. Yes, to the same degree. It completely changes the dynamic of the relationship and erases dependency.

Over the last 20 years, I have had the opportunity to watch tens of thousands people from all over the world make this amazing discovery. It's incredibly powerful and life-changing. We're truly mirrors of each other.

When you see that trait in yourself, you suddenly realize you can share your talents, mutually empowering one another. For example, if suddenly your career was to derail and your spouse was excelling professionally, you might minimize yourself for your spouse if you thought they had something you didn't. You might become addicted to this person and frightened of being left.

Yet, if you can see where your power is, and the form it takes, you can choose to share yours and to share in the other person's. In the coming pages, I'll show you how to awaken conscious awareness of all that you are and all that you have to share.

People often use the myth of loneliness to stay in an unfulfilling relationship, or to jump from one relationship to the next without discrimination. For those who are seemingly alone and buying into this myth, watch out for the number-one relationship repellant this myth creates: desperation.

Remember, nothing's missing.

You can become aware that you have everything you think a relationship delivers without the other person "giving" it to you.